"Abandoning your sense of reasoning, that's like you or you or you, sometimes. Right, Grandpa? I'm like you."
We begin with good intentions; inclusive; not offending anyone; and staying away from deep issues. (Destroy by a comment or family silencing members viewpoints.) These persons begin at the grade level of "E"
I formed a psyche emotional grading system that I taught in reverse at Mayo Clinic Psychiatry Center for Children. (I"ll keep the explanation in the standard order ABCDE.
Emotions are your smoke alarms. The alarms are real. The choices 'can' be confusing. We want to hit at the alarm to stop it. It takes courage to think of intelligent choices without hitting back. Courage to move form the grade "E" to "A". Mayo can help!
Accent the positives, Accept negotiation
Behavior of your brain and body
Communicate, Care, Consideration (Cool, Can)
Emotion, the Experience of perceptions
My students, especially one sixth grader, worked on the ABCDE with anticipation for each letter grade. The ABCDE lessons were required penmanship assignments copying one letter a day beginning with E. He was on letter "B", behavior of body and brain. He had truly completed moving from "E", his emotions controlling his actions through D, determination, and "C', communication. He acted like a young man with "hang-ups", and anxieties: weight, girls, and parents but he was aware he had choices and was not alone. When called names concerning his weight he rehearsed, "Please call me by my given name. My name is Bret, thank you," as he turned or moved away. ("B for Bret's Bravery" was my entry in his daily journal.)
If your behavior isn't taking you anywhere, why go there?
Sense the reasonable solution.
Kaye is a teacher and author of multiple works including Valerie Valentine Visits Vincent Vampire