We celebrate the "everyday" as mothers. Having completed Mother's Day, I'm feeling the daily tasks and joys every day as a mother. The joy of continuing our legacies, as mothers, of love and nurturing along the continuum - tapering dependence for support, comfort and sympathy. Realizing the child's rights and responsibilities.
My revelation of these truths, C. Anne, who entered the hospital as an over compliant twelve-year-old. She was an only child and had been encouraged to perform like a miniature adult. Her actions and choice of words, unbeknown to herself, mocked the adult role. (Reminiscent of the "Valley" girl characterization. "OMG can you believe my mother..., like, said that. Yeah, like, really stupid, like.")
C. Anne is classified as a drip, a nerd by her few friends' descriptions, according to her hospital entry forms. The younger students were uncomfortable with her fake superiority, shy act. She had been home schooled, daily tutored most of her academic years. My initial assumption of overbearing parents was confirmed by numerous doctor evaluations.
C. Anne had incapacitating migraine headaches lasting up to two and a half weeks associated with her jaw joint (temporomandibular joint anterior open bite). Treatment for her jaw locking included a dental appliance known as a splint, various medications and scoping of her jaw joint. The apparatus looked like prehistoric plastic with a straw hole puncture. Her entry notes to the children psychiatry center stated that her symptoms and treatment had severely hampered her ability to interact and learn in a standard classroom. (You can say that again.) C. Anne complied with every instruction in an adult manner.
Neuro-biolgical muscular feedback had been working. She began to share some knowledge and minimal communications in my classroom. I teased her about her newly inserted jaw appliance as state-of-the-art in orthodontia and that she would be the envy of "Braces Group" in her hometown. Then I told her that my niece once felt left out because she did not have orthodontic colored braces. This demur, submissive child had sent numerous signals using her previous jaw appliance as a flashing red light screaming quietly, "Stop, I need support." However, she had mistakenly carried her somatic behavior beyond her own control. Her hierarchy continued to taper medication and appliances. Her mother, with hospital help, decreased domineering support, comfort, and sympathy.
Celebrate the everyday. Your observations and interestingly joining participation will bring you joy every day!
Kaye is a teacher and author of multiple works including Valerie Valentine Visits Vincent Vampire